


Daydreams and Nightmares: Levihan Oneshots

by hanjinoyume



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Ending, Depression, Domestic, F/M, Female Hange Zoë, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Hizuru (Shingeki no Kyojin), Life Partners, Minor Original Character(s), Mostly Canon Compliant, One Shot, One True Pairing, Paths (Shingeki no Kyojin), Peace, Post-Apocalypse, Post-Canon, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Romance, Scientist Hange Zoë, Sexual Content, Suicide Attempt, Titans, levihan - Freeform, lovebirds
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-04
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-17 08:00:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,469
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29838468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hanjinoyume/pseuds/hanjinoyume
Summary: Ch 5 now up!."For some reason, he was suddenly struck by the memory of his mother... the layer of soot and dirt that always appeared across her face by the end of each day...She was never able to come back to the light, to breathe fresh air, or to see what he had accomplished...'I wish I could have brought my mother somewhere like this'".Levihan short stories from after the events of the manga/anime. Recovering from trauma, romance, 30-something life stuff...
Relationships: Levi Ackerman & Hange Zoë, Levi Ackerman/Hange Zoë, LeviHan, LevixHanji, hanjixlevi
Comments: 5
Kudos: 71





	1. January 855: a memoir for us

**Author's Note:**

> Ch 1:  
> Snowy bedroom ambience
> 
> First fanfic entry, y'all. Hope you enjoy!

My name is Hanji Zoe. I was born on September 5, 821, and I am 33 years old. I am already the Commander of the Survey Corps due to the tragic death of our inimitable former Commander, Erwin Smith. We don't generally live to be too old in our regiment.  
  
I'm tired. My true passion lies in research, but I was forced to go where the need commanded when Erwin died. Truthfully, I wish I could give the responsibility to Levi; he's far more of a leader than me. My lover and my comrade, my partner in all things in this earthly world. Born of the Underworld and refined by his training with us, there is not a person in this cruel, beautiful world I trust more.  
  
In the aftermath of the Rumbling's destruction, we were granted a lavish apartment in the military headquarters. At night, we lay huddled silently against one another under soft white sheets and a rich navy velvet blanket. How does one come back from the end of the world? Will we finally be free of the terror of the Titans, that which has defined our entire lives? And how will we prepare to bid farewell to the shifters who rode with us and gave everything to save us all? To Armin?  
  
In the old days, when Levi and I first succumbed to one another, all a frenzy of furtive glances, hasty encounters in cramped spaces, and secret candlelit kisses at midnight, we used to dream of what would come after. As our feelings deepened and fewer friends returned with us from each trip, we made a promise to each other to reach that new world together and to live fully in it, making every sacrifice of our fallen friends worth it. We even spoke, in hushed whispers and sometimes tears, of bringing a child into the world: new life after so much death.  
  
But now...what could we even think? What kind of life lay ahead in this world of cruel, indiscriminate mass murder, perpetrated by humans no less?  
  
In this early period, the leadership has mostly given us reprieve. We will be required to submit debriefings and participate in countless hearings, I'm sure, but royal mandate has given us space for now. On some days, Levi does not even eat, only sipping at the black tea I prepare for him throughout the day as he stares out at the falling snow.  
  
We were so close to losing each other, and he will scarcely leave me alone in the other room for too long before checking to make sure I'm alright and still there. Some nights I awaken in a cold sweat and scream when I see his shredded, bleeding face staring into mine. But he instantly grabs me and squeezes me close, letting my tears fall against his bare chest, and the flashback is ended as instantly as it came on.  
  
I am lying awake in the dim blue light of dawn. I reach for my glasses from the bedside table and squint at the clock in the corner to make out that it is 05:30 in the morning. Levi is sleeping, finally; the slow rhythm of his breath tells me as much. I set the glasses down again and curl up against him so that i feel his soft, warm breath on my collarbone. He proposed that we get out of this building today, which at times can feel like a luxurious prison. We'll be leaving for the arboretum on the edge of the headquarters' woods as the morning begins. I'll let him sleep more for now; gods know he deserves this rest.  
  
"Oi, Hanji," I hear him say softly. I look down and make out a very blurry silhouette of his head, or maybe that's his shoulder? I'm useless without my glasses. But I can still feel his breath against my chest and leaning forward, I try to kiss his forehead, instead bumping my chin hard on his head as he moves up toward me. "Ow!" I mutter, and can feel his pitying side-eye, even though I don't see it. "Tch. _Kuso megane_ ," he sighs. "Why are you awake?" He kisses my chin, then tilting it down to face him. "More of the same, I'm afraid," I tell him. "Rest now," he tells me, "I can keep watch for us". I let him pull me closer to rest my head on his chest and, breathing in the smell of his skin, I hear a pop and crack of the last embers in the wood stove. I finally feel my eyelids grow heavy and sigh in relief.


	2. All Over the Place

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi encounters Hanji in a frenzied, rageful state. Sparks of tension fill the air until suddenly, a chain reaction is set off.  
> ((I'm feeling restless today, too))
> 
> 03/06: Edited and much happier with this version.  
> Also manga 138 = rough......

"Fuck!" Hanji yelled, slamming the pen down to the desk and ripping the documents in front of her. She banged both fists on the mahogany surface for emphasis, then stood up and kicked the chair over behind her, feeling her blood boil. She lifted her glasses up to rest on her head and then, stretching her arms up above her, walked over to the picture window in front of her desk. There had been no more snow in the last few weeks, and the headquarters' grounds were accordingly all grey, brown and a deathly shadow of yellow-green. Tears began to form in the corners of her eyes, flushing her face even more, when she heard a key turn in the apartment door. _I am_ not _doing this right now_ , she thought, gritting her teeth.

The slow clacking of footsteps came to a stop no more than 2 meters behind her, but she maintained her gaze out the window, fingers interlaced behind her head. A sigh, and then silence. She was still so angry, so she said and did nothing. Suddenly, a hand grabbed her wrist and forcefully swung her around to face Levi, whose own expression was livid. In his right hand, he held the ripped papers from her desk. "Let me guess," he said, with the tone of a wild dog backed into a corner, "this is the report you've spent the last 4 days writing".

Hanji shook her wrist, and he released her. She moved closer, making their height differential more pronounced. "Captain," she said softly, "please educate me: which of my many moral failings does this represent today?"

"Tch," he muttered and started walking away. Suddenly he turned on his heel and came at her again, pointing his finger in her face. He knew she hated that and chose to twist the knife further. "Hanji, getting out of the city was _your_ idea. Again and again, you keep hiding things from me, sabotaging your work so that we'll end up stuck here in this goddamned bureaucratic prison forever! Your paralysis is going to destroy our possibilities for the future".

"Very easy for you to say. I'm sure your past few days have been very difficult going and playing the battered war hero to a bunch of sycophantic noblemen looking to find a way to capitalize on your celebrated status. I'm sure they loved your sardonic one-liners and weren't at all trying to decide which of their daughters they'd try and marry you off to. That powerful Ackerman bloodline, so alluring..."

"You...." Levi's word trailed into a growl, feeling his hands tighten into fists as Hanji continued.

"I'm sure they'll enjoy the egocentricity that comes along with that golden Ackerman blood. The coldness and distance. What do they care anyways? You're just a stud horse to them, and as long as you breed them heirs, maybe they will leave you alone like you want. You can clean and brew tea and explore your inner existential crises to your heart's desire..... And you won't be stuck depending on how well I do in my work. I hope you find what you want, I really do. Because I seem to be broken, and one of us should at least get something out of this goddamned paradise we gave so much for!"

That tripped a nerve. There seemed to be a magnetic force between them and it was oscillating wildly, pushing them away from and pulling them back toward one another. "Self-centered? Tch. You're one to talk, Commander Zoë," Levi said and smirked. "You need to step up if you want us to be able to have a sustainable future. Stop feeling so sorry for yourself and procrastinating like a lazy recruit!" Her eyes shot daggers and she turned her back on him again. He remembered the ripped documents now crumpled in his fist and slowly unfolded them, glancing down.

"USE OF DEADLY FORCE AGAINST SURVEY CORPS SQUAD MEMBERS WHILE PURSUING ASSET ZEKE YEAGER"

He flipped over the messy, scratched up paper Hanji had been writing on and read the formal letter below it.....She had been required to submit a detailed report regarding tactical considerations in killing the two Yeagerists outside of the forest where she had hid Levi after Zeke Yeager's attack. In particular, the new Commander-in-Chief wanted to know why she had resorted to killing her subordinates from a distance instead of subduing and capturing them for intelligence on the insurrection.

"Tch," he muttered in disgust, tossing the papers back on her desk. "I know this is not easy, Hanji, but..." Smack! His eyes widened as he realized she had just slapped him across the face. Her own face was flushed, and Levi could make out the shining tears in the corners of her eyes.

Anger flashed across his own face and they glared at each other. He broke the silence first, spitting wryly, "Wow, _megane_ , I know you've been paper pushing for awhile, but you really are losing your strength...I guess I'll know to start expecting less from the sex, then, too".

An exasperated noise emanated from somewhere deep in Hanji's throat, and she shoved him back against the stone wall beside the window, lifting him just off the floor by his cravat, forcing him to grab onto her wrists with both hands. "You fucking _chibi_ ," she snickered.

She should have known better. Levi's knees sprang up and locked onto her hips, and, throwing his hands onto her shoulders, too, he used this to propel her center of gravity backward until she bumped up against the desk. She released the cravat instantly and threw her hands back to stabilize herself, leaning back against the desk. Levi pulled himself against her and locked his knees behind her waist. Each of them was now panting a little, and Hanji lifted one hand, pulling Levi's face to her in a violent kiss. She bit his lower lip and drew back, whispering "I'm going to make you take that back about the sex". She jumped forward off the desk and walked him into the bedroom, leaning him onto the bed, still unmade from last night. Levi's gaze involuntarily locked onto the wrinkled sheets for a moment, but he snapped back to attention as soon as he felt Hanji's bare legs climbing onto him.

Through the V-shaped slit of her shirt collar, he caught sight of her smooth, round breasts hanging freely and he lifted himself up to unbutton the rest and bury his face into the space between then. He pushed her over to the side, and Hanji gasped as she felt him one of her breasts into his mouth, licking and biting and sucking it. He felt her leg reach up onto his hipbone, and suddenly he was on his back again, her arms pinning both of his down against the bed and her thighs straddling him on either side.

"I intend to make you regret what you said, Captain, but as your Commander, I also think your discipline should begin with you proving _your_ worth", she pronounced.

Levi smirked. "You need only give the order, _danchou_ ".

Hanji lifted her pelvis to plant her vulva softly on his mouth. "Okay, Ackerman. My first command," she teased, planting her arms on the wall in front of her. Levi's eyes fluttered shut as he explored her. He dutifully attended to penetrating her with his tongue, moaning as he tasted her, and massaged her labia with his lips and tongue. Feeling his tongue inside her, Hanji's hips began to rock on him slowly, and he looked up to see her eyes closed, lost in the sensation. Finding her growing clit, Levi started to kiss her there, using his tongue and lips to push back the hood and caress it. He started to get lost in the fresh, familiar taste of his lover, grabbing her hips with his hands and guiding her back and forth as he licked and sucked at her. For her part, Hanji was starting to lose control and gave him control over her hips, as the sensation growing within her had her entire nervous system on edge. At the last second, the control came back to her and she rode him to the rhythm coming from inside her, unleashing a wave of electricity that ran like lightning to her breasts, her neck, all along her arms, and down to her toes. As she moaned and gasped, Levi guided his hands up her back to lower her down so she didn't fall. He leaned forward and caressed her face, kissing her lightly all over. She smiled and giggled, letting the much-needed wave of relaxation take over completely.

Suddenly, she lifted up and caressed his face with her hand, giving him a long, tender kiss. As she lay her head back down, she looked away and said, "I didn't mean before that you were not valuable....if anything I was frustrated because I feel so much the opposite. The thought of anyone treating you like you're not the most important thing in this world makes my skin crawl." She looked back at him. "I want you to feel valued by me". Levi smiled and kissed her again, pinning her hands over her head. "No one else is getting any of me", he spoke softly.

He began to lift her arms up and, wrapping his other hand under the arch of her back, flipped her onto her stomach. "May I?" he asked, and she made a soft, excited noise, curling her thighs and her ass upward until she felt him, hard, balancing on top of her cheeks. "Hanji...." he purred, "I've really needed this". She sighed happily and stretched her arms out in front of her as Levi entered her, thrusting his throbbing cock deep inside her. "Uhnnnnh" he moaned. He slid his hands up from her hips to squeeze her breasts and in this way started to push into her firmly in a steady rhythm. The pressure of him inside her gave Hanji a burst of joy. It was so familiar and felt so right. Levi was enjoying this, she could tell. He lowered his head down to her back and she felt sweat on his hair drip onto her as he kissed her. Suddenly a nip and then a harder bite, right on the skin above her ribs. "I take back what I said", he panted. She laughed and pushed her ass back harder against his desperate thrusts. Time slowed for awhile, and it seemed all there was was that warm, pulsing connection between them. She noticed when his hands grabbed her ass again and she felt him straightening up, kneeling behind her. He panted "I'm so close," and pulled out, dripping with her wetness. He started rubbing himself above her ass, closing his eyes. "Can you finish inside me?" he suddenly heard, looking down at her again. Between the question and the view of her ass below him, he started to throb harder and had to take a breath before confirming: "Hanji, are you sure?" She flipped over to face him, gliding her long leg in front of him to straddle him again. "Please...." she whined, "I know we both want this". He smiled and guided himself back inside her. "I can't dream of anything better," he said with a smile. Together their hips rocked back and forth, and she felt his thrusts become faster and more powerful. "Hanji!" he grunted, before his mouth opened wide and his eyes rolled back into his head. He felt her internal muscles contract around him as he emptied his semen inside her, and stayed there for a long time, his shivers accentuated by Hanji's nails running up and down his arms, back and legs.

Finally, Levi rolled over to the side, careful to stay inside her as he didn't want this connection to end. He thought of the Paths and the theoretical paper Hanji had guided him through to understand. In no other moment did it make as much sense; he could feel something tying them together.

He caught sight of Hanji's eyes, glistening and surrounded by the pink, rosy glow on her cheeks he loved so much to see. "I'm sorry," they said simultaneously, and laughed, each in their own way. "Hanji, I was scared for us. That...I wasn't angry at you...I can help you!" he stuttered.

"I know," she said, pulling him closer, a little smile on her face. Levi sighed in relief, knowing that she could understand his shit attempts at explaining where his reaction had come from. "Can we rest like this, _anata?_ Just for a little," she asked.

"Sure" he whispered, letting his own eyelids lower. "As long as this siesta is followed immediately by a bath," he added hastily.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my....I knew I was restless but...this did the trick!  
> Got a little fluffier than I was aiming for at the end, but makeup sex is supposed to end that way.  
> Hope you enjoy!
> 
> 03/07: I started working on the next chapter and it was going beautifully, but I lost most of it! Loss on a magnitude of the War for Paradis -_- Anyway, it's going to flash us back to how Levi and Hanji reconnected after being separated when the Rumbling reached Odiha.


	3. What Happened (Pt 1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happened at war's end, and how did Levi and Hanji meet again?  
> [Sailing vibes. We're on a boat!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AHbwoG23dMo)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this because Ch 138 has been really eating away at my joy, and I needed a nicer story to play in my head instead. It ended up needing to be a little longer than I first imagined, so I'll break it into parts.

Everything burned. Hanji kept her eye focused on the Odiha dock, waiting and waiting to see the flying boat pull out. _Damn it!_ _I’m just going to have to keep going_. Her sleeve burst aflame and she kept flying, throwing another thunderspear into the next titan’s nape. _Four!_ She looked out again, but still nothing. She felt a lump in her throat...her arms were not responding anymore. “Aaaaggghhhhh!!!” she screamed in pain. And suddenly a whooshing sound; would that cool breeze put out the flames? _No, I’m falling_ , she realized. Unsure if it was her dying thoughts or the speed of the wind, Hanji felt her eye begin to tear. Something smacked the back of her head. Everything went black.

* * *

Gasping, she opened her eye again and saw blue skies overhead. “What about the flying boat?!” she yelled involuntarily.

“It took off,” a deep, familiar voice answered.

“Huh...?”

“Hange,” she turned to face the source of the voice... _Erwin?!_ “You did your duty.” He stood there in his uniform, smiling at her. All around him, she saw soldiers smiling at her while others pointed up toward the flying boat taking off into the sky. Mike. Moblit. Nanaba. Sasha.

“Erwin...everyone…” her voice faltered. _So this is it...this feels….strange. I miss them so much, but...this doesn’t feel right. It can’t be time for this yet...._ She caught sight of the boat flying into the distance. “...Oh,” she whispered. _I guess...it’s the best I could’ve done._ She paused for a moment, fighting down tears. _Why am I crying in the afterlife? Aren’t I supposed to feel ready to move on?_

Staying true to herself, she pushed the tears down and let Moblit help her up. She really _had_ missed them all so much. She shot Erwin a teasing glance. “Do you know how much trouble I went through because you named me Commander...?” she laughed.

“Really?” he lifted an eyebrow.

“Yeah...it must’ve been a lot,” Moblit said in an empathetic tone.

Mike snorted, “that idiot Eren.”

Erwin smiled at her again. “We’re here to listen”.

* * *

Hanji awoke with a start, her heart pounding in her chest. She sat up and suddenly her hands flew back down to grab at the surface beneath her….a stretcher? It felt like it was swaying back and forth, but it appeared to be standing firm and upright on the floor beneath it. It was mostly dark, but a blue ray of light was shining in the corner from somewhere outside this place. _What the fuck is this…..?_

Next surprise: a needle was taped into her arm, with a tube running up to a bag of fluid... _oh. Intravenous fluids, OK._ Still, this was very strange, it felt like just a second ago she had been joining her old comrades after her own death. She stiffened. Was the next phase of the afterlife a hell? Time to explore. She pulled the needle out of her arm and examined her body as best she could. She seemed to be wearing loose, light linen clothing, and what skin was not covered by clothing seemed mostly wrapped up in bandages. She lifted her legs over the side of the stretcher and went to jump down. CRASH! They buckled beneath her and worse, her skin seemed to be on fire everywhere that it touched the ground. _Again?!_ “Son of a titanfucker!!” she yelled, then screamed in pain. Something was very wrong here.

Lantern light appeared in the distance, growing closer through what appeared to be a ship door. Footsteps hurried toward her and finally a figure stood in the entrance, dark and silhouetted by the light of the lantern he held behind him. He swung the lantern forward to get a better look, and Hanji squinted for a moment before observing a short, middle-aged man with salt & pepper hair and large, round gold-rimmed spectacles staring back at her. “AAYIIIII!!” he yelled, and set the lantern on a table before rushing over to help her up. She winced before he even touched her, but he reassured her, “no, grab my hand here, and I’ll put my other under your elbow, just like this, alright?” She hesitated but he was able to lift her back onto the stretcher without causing any more fire to rush across her skin. She could feel the sweat from her face even stinging as it hit tender wounds on her cheek and jaw. “Thank...thank you” she managed. Before she could even ask, the stranger had poured her a cup of water, which she gulped down hungrily.

“So…” he began. “My daughters have a running bet on who or what you are. Sawako says you’re probably a witch”. Hanji grimaced, uneasy about where this might be going. “Risa says you might be a magical phoenix!” He put his thumb and forefinger to his chin, examining her for a moment. “And my wife says you are ‘that poor woman you’re treating like a science experiment, Kenji; you need to leave her alone if she’s to have any chance of making it!’” Hanji gasped, and Kenji chuckled. “But I have a guess of my own! Risa is not too far off, I think. It would seem…” he reached a finger toward her and bopped it on the patch covering her left eye, “that you are a magical _jian_ bird”. 

Hanji was only half hearing him as the possibility flooded over her... _no, there is no way I could have survived that fire, or that fall, or being trampled to death under the Rumbling._ “Don’t worry, I’ll tell you!” he went on. “The _jian_ bird is a mythical creature that lives deep in the mountains of Hizuru, along the very borders of our best drawn maps. Each bird is only born with one eye and one wing”. Hanji looked at him uncomfortably. His passion reminded her of herself, but it had been so long since she had felt that way. “But for each bird is also born a mate, which is its mirror image. By leaning against one another and working together, the _jian_ birds can survive, scoping out any dangers in the environment and flying away if need be”. He sighed and smiled. “That’s what you are, a little _jian_ bird who got lost and flew right into the fire”.

Hanji frowned. “That’s...er...a great story, but not really the most inspiring right now. As you can see, I’m alone here”.

“True, true…” he tutted to himself. “But alas! Here we are at the end of the world,” he sighed.

* * *

Dawn came soon after, and Hanji didn’t know whether to believe everything that was happening. Apparently, she was on a sailing yacht with the eccentric Hizuran doctor, Kenji Otsuka, and his family. Skeptical of Hizuru’s diplomatic efforts with Paradis, they had set out just before the Rumbling began. The plan was to keep a safe distance away while staying close enough to the action to find out what would happen. If the Rumbling did wipe out Marley, would Hizuru be next? They needed to keep themselves flexible and prepared for anything. 

They had arrived to Odiha just the morning after the Rumbling had come through and found Hanji stretched across a ledge of earth in a deep sinkhole filled with water. “How did you know I was alive?” she had asked Dr. Otsuka.

“ _Sou na_ …” he trailed off. “I didn’t, to be sure. But I was so curious: your arm was outstretched having stabbed a raven with a small dagger. You seem to have kept the scavengers at bay just long enough. ‘That is a person who wants to survive!’ I said to myself ”.

Dr. Otsuka’s careful attention, with aggressive fluid hydration and wound care, had saved her life. Burns covered almost 30% of her body’s surface, he told her. “Why would you expend so many of your resources saving me?” she later asked him. “That gamble would’ve gone the other way probably 9 times out of 10”.

“People are a resource” he said, “among the most valuable in this new world. You’ve raised all our chances of surviving now”.

* * *

Hanji was careful at first to conceal her identity from the family, letting them get to know her as Nanaba. The only questions that Dr. Otsuka demanded she answer upfront: “how many people have you killed? And why?” She was clearly a soldier, so her kill count was no surprise to him, but her response, “only ever to protect the ones I love,” seemed to satisfy him.

Over the next few weeks, she began to develop a quick friendship with all the family, and she appreciated their respectfulness, not pushing her for more details of what had happened to her. At the end of each day, she supervised Sawako sorting through the fish, crabs and other bounty they caught, deciding on new names together for the species they could not recognize. Dr. Otsuka’s wife, Fumiko, helped her stretch and train her strength back each day on the deck of the boat while Risa tended to the sails.

Within a few weeks, Hanji could walk again with support and she was anxious to turn her focus to her friends. She shared her whole story with the Otsuka family. Determined to get to the bottom of any mystery, she and Dr. Otsuka spent over an hour figuring out how she had survived. Their working theory was that ricocheting off of the Colossal Titans’ bodies as she fell had broken the speed of her impact with the ground. Furthermore, she had fallen into the most fortunate of footprints, one which had broken open a previously confined aquifer and formed a sinkhole. The pool of water broke her fall, and the depth of the hole protected her from being crushed by the titans’ march. 

Hanji had no idea, however, what had become of her comrades. Could she even be sure that the flying boat made it to Fort Salta? Was everything with Erwin, Moblit and the others all a hallucination? As the Otsuka ship sailed into the bay, they found nothing was left behind. Around the fortress, the land was just barren, brown dust, and if there had been any military there, they hadn’t been there in some time. Expeditions showed not one human around, alive or dead. _What happened here?_

Curiously, they had also lost track of the Rumbling. Dr. Otsuka hadn’t caught a clear glimpse of the Colossals in over 2 weeks. Could it be…over?

At night, Hanji lay in her bunk envisioning the world of the Paths that she had seen long ago in the forest when Eren first broadcast to all the Subjects of Ymir. Had it not been in the context of such terror, it would have been a wondrous place to explore. She placed her hand over her heart, feeling its steady rhythm and closed her eye trying to visualize that world again. If they were truly all connected, then maybe she could send something along the Paths herself. It was all so unscientific and messy, a near religious leap of faith, but she had to try something. And so it was that for the first time she began to pray every night, begging, “ _Ymir-sama_ , whether in life or in death, please bring me back to Levi”.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are a couple of references to The Walking Dead. Did ya notice? :D
> 
> Hope you enjoyed!


	4. What Happened (Pt 2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi and Hanji find their way back to one another.
> 
> Filing this story away in my head as an alternate ending for these two because I can't handle the canon. Poor heroes. Just let them be at peace, Isayama!
> 
> Feels:  
> [Paths Vibe](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q5-DYwciI1A)  
> [Levi Trauma Theme](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=13zWLOs4jgg)

It had been a day since they ran into the Marleyan fishing trawler headed south, filled with refugees. The Otsuka family had donated the little they could spare and swapped intelligence with the trawler’s crew, who was looking for a safe port where they could restock supplies and potentially drop off some of the refugees. Among everyone, however, no one had seen anything left standing north of Fort Salta.

When they bid farewell to the trawler, Dr. Otsuka brought Hanji out from the cabin to discuss their findings. Hanji’s eyes shone with curiosity, but her expression remained stoic. “ _Danchou,_ word is….the Rumbling is over. They say it ended here at Fort Salta, in fact.”

“Any survivors?” she inquired, “and what of Eren and the Marleyan Titans?”

“Well the vessel picked up radio chatter that the TItans, the Warriors and Eren, at least, all vanished! Of course, no one could confirm if they had just become humans again; the conflict sounds like it took place a good deal away from the actual fort. And,” his voice quivering with excitement, “they say there was even a _flying_ Titan!!”

“What?!” Hanji’s eyes went wide with excitement, but after a moment her expression darkened. “Dr. Otsuka,” she began, “with the Titans gone, why is the base now empty?”

“Ah, yes…” he lowered his voice again, speaking more seriously this time. “Hanji, your friends...if they did make it to Fort Salta...Apparently one of the Titans released a noxious smoke, and all of the Eldians were turned into Pure Titans. They must have started wandering away before we arrived”.

“I see…” her eyes fell into the canteen of fresh water she held in her lap. _They wouldn’t have run from any fight_ ... _If they made it to Fort Salta, they definitely made it to the battle._ Hanji closed her eyes and sighed. _Armin and the other shifters would have been immune to the gas, and Mikasa and Levi, as well. But the others? Jean, Connie, Gabi..._ She opened her eyes again and took a big swig of cold water. “What now, then, Doctor?” she asked quietly.

He reached across and put a steadying hand on Hanji’s shoulder. “Commander, it’s not safe for you to travel any farther South in Marley right now. If anyone does remain alive, we have to assume that vengeance on Eldians will be swift and merciless. You will be too well known a figure in Marley to escape detection.”

Dr. Otsuka’s wife, Fumiko, nodded and continued, “Hanji _danchou_ , please come with us. We can go back to Hizuru and see if we can’t find out more information there. You already have met Lady Azumabito. You would receive a warm welcome. And you’ve been so good with Risa and Sawako...it would be good for them to have an older sister around.” The girls were seated quietly but they smiled shyly as their mother made the suggestion.

Hanji blushed and smiled sadly. _What would Erwin do…._? Undoubtedly he would warn that the fight isn’t over yet, and though we may lose many we must continue forward. “Maybe I will, but first I need to return to Paradis. I swore an oath to my people and I need to fulfill my duty to them.”

Dr. Otsuka nodded solemnly. “Of course. We understand”. We can take you there before heading onward”. 

Hanji bowed deeply. “I will be forever indebted to you all”.

* * *

She had no idea what to expect on the return to Paradis. What would be left? Furthermore, it could take days, at best, to reach what used to be Wall Maria on foot.

Luckily, there was still order enough that Garrison troops guarded the remains of the docks. It seemed that political tensions remained, though there was a cautious coexistence at present. Hanji would be escorted into the capital city of Mitras to meet with military leadership. 

As for the Otsuka family, they were welcomed as visiting Hizurans and offered assistance to restock their supplies and have their boat repaired. Hanji was uneasy about entrusting the family’s wellbeing to the military, but she was able to negotiate that they would travel to Mitras directly with her. She would do her best to keep them safe.

* * *

Comfortable that the Otsuka family was safe in their Mitras residence, Hanji was escorted through the old, familiar halls of the military headquarters. She smiled, seeing Erwin’s portrait again, then stopped dead in her tracks.The portrait that had been made of her upon taking the role of Commander was hanging next to Erwin’s.

Hanji Zoë - 14th Commander of the Survey Corps

5 September, 821 - 9 September, 854

The Garrison soldiers turned back toward her and she laughed, slapping a hand on each of their shoulders. “Well would ya look at that?” She smiled. “Someone here still cares!”

The soldiers smiled uneasily. “Yes, _danchou_ … by royal decree, the Yeagerist movement was labelled an insurrection and all their prisoners freed”. Hanji’s eyebrows raised in pleasant contemplation and they continued on.

She was given a military dress uniform to change into. Looking at herself in a mirror, she suddenly felt as though she’d been transported to a different universe. Was she really in no danger? Her hand raised to her face, pulling her bangs to the side. Yep, that part of her eyebrow had been singed off and was never coming back, it seemed. Hanji turned around at a knock on the door and greeted her escorts. “ _Danchou_ , the carriage is ready”.

* * *

The dress uniform, she learned, was in preparation for a meeting with the queen that had been scheduled for the afternoon. Once arrived at the palace, Hanji was escorted to a large conference room with an oval shaped table. As she waited, the commander stared out the window at the royal gardens, her arms crossed behind her back. What would have gone differently if Eren had been forthcoming about how to unlock the Founding Titan’s full power? If Historia had inherited Eren’s Titan, how many of her friends might still be alive? How many millions of Marleyans or Eldians of the diaspora?

“Hanji _danchou_ ,” Historia’s voice rang like sweet bells from behind her. Hanji turned around and bowed deeply. The queen wore a simpler dress, all in red, adorned nonetheless with gold, sapphires and diamonds. “It is we who owe you respect, Hanji. Without your service, millions more lives might have been lost”.

 _So the Rumbling truly was stopped?!_ Hanji’s face froze, stunned. “I understand the Hizuran family you brought with you deserves our thanks for your presence today?”

Hanji nodded, “yes, Your Majesty. They saved me from what would’ve been almost certain death”.

“They will be given whatever they need, including the option to remain here if they should choose. Much of Hizuru was also lost to the Rumbling,” she said softly, wearing a pained expression.

Hanji lowered her head and took a deep breath, then began, “Historia, how do you know of all this? Tell me everything you know about what happened. I lost the others at Odiha in Marley. I…I have no idea what happened to them, or how this all ended.”

“Of course,” Historia nodded, then motioned to a guard at the door. “I have called two of your comrades for a debriefing.” The door opened, and Armin and Mikasa walked in. Their faces all lit up on seeing each other, and Hanji ran over to hug them both before they all sat down. 

“I have so many questions! That day you all escaped on the flying boat; I’ve barely learned anything since then. The Rumbling, a flying Titan, Eren! What happened?” Her speech was pressured and Armin began to open his mouth when she cut him off, “No! Wait! First, first! Tell me, did you all end up going to Fort Salta? What about the others? Where are they?”

Armin stuttered, “H-H-Hanji _danchou_ , we all were at Fort Salta. The Founding Titan released a gas, and all of the Eldians….Jean, Connie, Gabi…” his eyes lowered, “they were all transformed into Pure Titans”. Mikasa looked down at the table uneasily.

Hanji slammed her hand against the table. “ _Kuso…”_ she muttered under her breath, gritting her teeth to hold back tears. “They were all far too young to die there, so far away from home”. Armin observed her through tired eyes. “And all the others?” Hanji held her breath.

She could sense growing discomfort in Armin as he continued, “well, we never found Onyankopon...the Marleyan Warriors came back with us, that is, Reiner, Annie, Pieck and Falco...”

Hanji was literally leaning on the edge of her seat. “And Levi?” Armin looked down and Hanji could see a tear forming in the corner of his eyes. _No._ _It can’t be. They couldn’t have all made it back but him...but he_ was _injured_ …

Mikasa spoke up suddenly, looking intently at Hanji. “Hanji _danchou_ , the Captain returned with us.” _Hope!_ “But…” _But what? What is going on? Why isn’t he here?_ “Two nights ago, I was asked to deliver some documents to _heichou_...but…” Tears started to stream down her face, too.

“Damn it, Mikasa, where is he?!” yelled Hanji, desperate now. 

Mikasa took a deep breath. “Hanji- _san_ , when he didn’t respond, I could sense that something was wrong...I broke into his room and I found him with his wrists sliced open, bleeding out in his bath.”

Hanji felt as though a knife had pierced her heart, and it was starting to twist. She had scratched her way back from death’s doorstep across a war-torn world, and the chance for them to finally reunite was going to be taken from her like this? Her head lowered and her hands rose to her heart, as though that would stop the pain. _No…_ ”No,” she started to say quietly. “No...no...no!!” now she was yelling. 

Armin jumped up and put his hands up to signal her to stop, “ _danchou!_ He isn’t dead yet. He’s in the capital hospital! The doctors are doing everything they can”. Hanji’s eyes widened and she straightened again.

Historia spoke decisively, “the transport is already arranged, Commander. You will go now”. Hanji looked desperately at Historia and nodded in thanks.

* * *

It had been 3 days since Hanji had been staying at the hospital, and she still hadn’t been allowed to see Levi. She had been granted a lavish suite reserved for elite visitors, but all she could do was wait for more updates from the doctors. Although they had repaired his wounds and managed to resuscitate him with blood transfusion, the Captain had awoken in a delirious rage, and it had taken several large male orderlies and a significant amount of sedatives to keep him down. He was being held in the hospital’s asylum while doctors tried to stabilize him.

Dr. Korhonen, the lead physician in the asylum, had managed to rouse Levi from sedation and orient him to his present situation without triggering the agitation he had displayed on waking the first several times. He had gotten Levi out of the straitjacket that had initially been forced on him. Today, Hanji would finally be allowed to visit with him. The doctor bowed deeply upon meeting her and led her to the door of a small courtyard garden. He explained, “when the patient awakens in a new location, after that amount of blood loss and with all the trauma he’s endured of late, he can experience a delirious psychosis. Now that he is better stabilized, reorientation to familiar places, things and people can help bring him back to reality.” His expression was solemn. “And we need him to improve, because as things stand, he doesn’t eat, drink, or sleep. He is becoming catatonic.”

Hanji was terrified but tried to keep a brave face on for her lover’s sake. She had seen soldiers return from battle forever broken by the horrors they had witnessed. “He has been asking for you, _danchou_ ,” Dr. Korhonen added softly, “although it is unclear to us whether he is sometimes experiencing melancholic hallucinations.” Hanji took in a small gasp, quickly forcing her expression back into one of stoic resolution. _He remembers me, but will he remember everything that happened?_

“My team and I will remain nearby, for your safety’s sake,” Dr. Korhonen reminded her, “but we will hope for the best”. Hanji nodded.

“Doctor, I cannot thank you and your team enough,” she said solemnly. “No matter what happens, I will take responsibility for the Captain. The Survey Corps will never abandon him”.

Dr. Korhonen smiled sadly. “You really are as noble as they say, _danchou_. It is not often our patients have visitors or family to look out for them”.

Hanji followed the doctor through a door into the small courtyard. Although November’s chill was beginning to settle into the air, the garden was still punctuated by the beautiful dark greens of some evergreen shrubs, as well as the saturated reds of berries. Her heart stopped when she saw the back of Levi’s head as he sat on a bench facing away from them. His hair had grown out a little and was tied back above the undercut. Nonetheless, it was unmistakably him; the height was a dead giveaway.

“Nurse,” Dr. Korhonen called, “Captain Ackerman has a visitor.” The nurse looked up in acknowledgement, made a small bow toward Levi, and walked away. Dr. Korhonen stopped a short distance away and looked at Hanji. “Go ahead, Commander,” he said softly.

Hanji lifted her hand to her heart for a moment, feeling it beating uncontrollably fast, then took a deep breath and strode forward toward the bench where Levi sat. She came to a stop beside him and haltingly, began with his name. “Levi?” she inquired.

The captain gave no response, not even an indication that he had heard her. She paused for a moment, then walked in front of him and kneeled. Still, no acknowledgement. Beginning to choke up, Hanji addressed him again, the emotion in her voice beginning to rise. “Levi, it’s me, Hanji. I made it back...”

With no further response, she looked to the doctor for help but found he was staring toward the ground, trying to give them some privacy. “Levi, please,” she began, and she reached out to take his hand, lying limp at his side. No sooner than her fingers had touched his cold skin, his hand had sprung up and grabbed her by the wrist. His eyes looked coldly into hers, and his voice seethed, “leave..me...alone, you demon! You keep me here in this cruel world, but stop torturing me with her!” Hanji’s face was filled with shock, and then terror, as he sprang forward and pushed her back onto the ground, his hands gripped tightly around her neck choking her.

Luckily, the sound of her hitting the ground alerted the doctor and his team, and they sprang into action, running over to pull Levi off of her. Levi screamed like a wounded animal as they restrained him, and his eyes, anguished, locked with the doctor’s. “Please!!” he begged. “Make it stop, please! Make these ghosts and voices go away!!”

“Will you take a tincture, Captain?!” the doctor inquired in a loud, authoritative voice. Levi nodded. “Yes, please...coderoin... anything!” he panted. A nurse came forward quickly, pouring a purple liquid into a small metal cup and offered it up to his lips, and Hanji watched as he drank it desperately.

“Breathe, Captain,” he commanded. Hanji looked on, tears streaming down her face, and she saw them begin to run down Levi’s cheeks, too. He followed the doctor’s order, and Hanji observed as his breathing began to deepen and slow. He looked so helpless and childlike, she thought. Of course, she’d seen him cry before, but the blind rage from just moments before? It was horrifying to see.

“ _Heichou_ ,” the doctor began in a low, but commanding, voice, “can we release you? Can you listen to me and follow my commands?” Levi nodded, looking defeated and helpless again. The attendants released his arms and legs, and he let his hands fall to the ground lifelessly, as he leaned back against a stone ledge encircling an elevated flower bed. Dr. Korhonen, choosing his words carefully, explained, “Levi, someone came from a long way away to visit you. I would like you to try and talk to them for a few minutes”.

“I thought it was her,” Levi muttered dejectedly. “I’m sorry, doctor”. His gaze was focused on the grass in front of him.

Dr. Korhonen gestured for Hanji to come forward again and, haltingly, she kneeled down beside him. Her mind had been racing...how to make him believe her? She moved a bit closer to Levi, despite the risk, pausing for a moment awaiting any reaction. Then, in a coordinated motion, she placed her hand over his heart and lifted one of his hands onto her chest. A shudder swept throughout her, feeling the circuit complete, and she remembered all the nights lying awake on the boat, trying to send her intention through the Paths to her partner. Slowly, Levi began to lift his other hand, running it along her arm first before lifting it to her chin. His eyes darted back and forth, taking her face in. “Real?” he looked to her and then to Dr. Korhonen, who nodded. “But you died. Armin, Mikasa, Connie, Jean... they all watched you die.”

“I almost did,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper, “I saw our comrades, Levi. Mike, Nanaba, Moblit. Petra, Sasha, and Erwin.” Tears continued to fall down Levi’s face. “But something wouldn’t let me go,” she continued.

“I’ve looked for you every night since you died,” he whispered. “I kept ending up in that desert...the world of the Paths…searching...” he trailed off. Levi lifted himself up onto his knees, looking into Hanji’s eyes, his own glistening with tears. He leaned forward and wrapped his arms around her, resting his head against her chest. Hanji smiled and embraced him back.

Dr. Korhonen let a small smile appear. “Commander, if you’d like, you can stay down here with us. There is a residential suite attaching to the courtyard, from where we can be in easy access while the Captain continues his recovery. My attendant can bring your belongings”.

Hanji turned to the doctor and smiled, mouthing the words, “thank you”. The doctor helped the two of them up, and showed them over to a dark blue door. They strode in and found a modest suite with a bed, bathroom, and small kitchen. Large windows looked down the hill on which the hospital was located and out across the capital. Levi remained leaning against Hanji’s shoulder, focused only on her. She thanked the doctor and brought Levi over to lie on the bed as he closed the door. Levi’s fingers gripped her coat, clinging onto the sturdy green fabric over her chest. His grey eyes opened again and he looked directly into hers. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I didn’t know you were alive. I was trying to join you”. 

Hanji kissed his forehead. “I won’t leave you again”.

 _“Megane_ ,” Levi said, looking up at her, some of the life coming back into his voice, “marry me”.

Hanji smiled and leaned in for a long, passionate kiss. “Yes, a thousand times yes,” she whispered.

Levi leaned forward, sighing contentedly. “Hanji,” he began, fighting to keep his eyelids open as his eyes darted back and forth in futile saccades, “I can’t remember the last time I slept”.

She smiled and kissed the top of his head as he passed out immediately in her arms. Finally, she could rest, too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> I write these to just get this out of my head. It thrills me to know that other people enjoy them, too!
> 
> The reunion was loosely inspired by [this scene](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o3sj7nGzC64), from the film, A Very Long Engagement. One of my favorites, 10/10 would recommend.


	5. April 855 - ne, Levi?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm trying to keep characters consistent with their personalities, but also they have suffered so much... I just want Levi to be able to enjoy his life for once!
> 
> * in my story, I'm assuming that there will be no more Titans after the War. If Ymir Fritz decides to stop being everyone's slave, then maybe she won't keep making people into Titans? Or if she dies...again...
> 
> [Enjoy Paradis without Walls!](https://youtu.be/ZvyVHGCI1UM)

Levi awoke to the pleasant sensation of sunshine warming his arm. He opened one eye lazily and observed the warm yellow light of morning shining through billowing curtains into their modest inn room. He rolled over to observe his companion in bed, using his good eye to trace each of the scars across the sand-colored skin of her back.

He inched over to her and wrapped his arm around her chest, pulling himself up to rest his head right behind hers. As he buried his face into the curve of her neck, he was spellbound by the fragrant notes of ginger and honey emanating from her soft chestnut hair. He exhaled slowly, enraptured; there was no greater aphrodisiac for him than fresh, clean smells mixing with her skin’s natural scent. Hanji stirred and murmured, “analysis…”, leaning her body backward just slightly to fit against his. He lifted his hand up to her face, somewhat awkwardly caressing her lower lip and jaw with his thumb and remaining fingers. A ghostly pink line on the inside of his wrist caught his eye as he stroked her face, and he recoiled, bringing his hand back down to her chest to squeeze her closer again. His heart beat faster and he closed his eyes, letting his other senses wash over him: the sweet smells of her hair and skin, the feel of her heart pulsing slowly against his palm, and the quiet hiss of her breath. The memory of his suicide attempt lingered always in the back of his mind like the remnants of a nightmare.

They lay together like that for what felt like not nearly long enough when Hanji sighed happily and stretched her arms in front of her, rolling over to face Levi. “I know you must have been awake for hours,” she teased.

“And if I had been fortunate enough to be asleep, you’d make quick work of depriving me again,” he said dryly.

“It’s a tall order, but someone’s got to keep you on track,  _ heichou _ ,” she joked in a singsong voice. “Without me, I fear you’d have missed the whole day I’ve planned for us!”

Levi snorted, “and for once I might have actually caught up on my sleep deficit. Thank you,  _ danchou _ .” He smiled and rested his thumb against her chin, leaning in to kiss her softly.

Hanji returned the kiss, then pushed him playfully onto his back. “Levi, can you imagine what the civilians would think if they ever saw you actually smile like this?”

Levi smirked and caressed the sides of Hanji’s body down to her hips. “So many things reserved only for you,  _ megane _ ”.

Hanji wrapped the sheet around her, lifting the sides up to her chest while shaking her head. She looked adorable. “Ooohh, luckiest woman in the world I am,” she chirped, and hopped out of bed, the sheet trailing haphazardly behind her. She twirled and the sheet spun with her, falling to drape one side of her buttocks, leaving the other long leg exposed.

“Levi, remember the look on that young girl’s face after she tried to kiss you at the royal ball? Ah! It’s the kind of gratification I live for!” she squealed.

Levi’s face soured. “Hanji, you were the one who led the poor girl on, making the show of introducing us and later abandoning me in that deserted hallway”.

“Well, Levi, the Inocencio family is loaded, and while you were playing my game, her father agreed to donate a significant sum for the Corps’ coming expeditions into Northern Paradis,” she beamed. “I haven’t lost it yet! Erwin and Mike would be proud of my fundraising.”

“Tch…the noble Survey Corps. Saviors of humanity beyond the Walls and cons within,” Levi sighed.

“Righteous redistribution,” Hanji laughed. “Besides, you have to admit the game grew on you eventually.”

“I don’t remember agreeing for you to flirt with all those financiers from Stohess”. He frowned.

“But you did enjoy saving me from them….am I right, am I right?” she said with a wink.

He smirked. “And the sex was  _ exceptionally good _ after”.

“Hm? Which part? Under the staircase...in the carriage...in the HQ gardens?”

“Exactly,” he growled, moving close enough to the edge of the bed to grab the sheet she was holding and pull her back onto him.

“I can seduce that young stableboy caring for our horses if you want more chase,” she whispered into his ear.

Levi put his arm around her and flipped her onto her back, leaning over her with her thighs lightly grazing his torso on either side. “Less talking,  _ kuso-megane _ .”

* * *

Levi leaned back in his saddle, watching a lone bird soaring above them. This feeling of riding in the open would never get old for him. He looked over at Hanji and she caught his gaze. “It feels good not having to gallop at full speed all the time, doesn’t it?” she offered, smiling. He nodded, looking up at the sky again. Suddenly, the bird he’d seen before dove toward the ground, screaming, lifting up again just as quickly. Hanji observed his curiosity as he watched the hunt, his mouth opened just the tiniest bit in awe. She laughed, “It’s a goshawk, Levi. Do you like it?”

Embarrassed, Levi shrugged. “It was just...loud…” She gave him a knowing look, and he rolled his eyes. “Fine, Hanji. What do you know about it?”

“ _ Well, _ my friend, I am very glad you asked. I happen to have obtained a guide to the wingèd fauna of the Northern Districts, and the goshawk is a truly noble bird of prey. Well chosen, Levi, you have very refined taste in raptors.” Levi felt his heart swell as Hanji started to gesticulate wildly, her voice gaining that musical quality it always did when she found a passion project. “In fact, you can see that we’re approaching the edge of the forest soon. Goshawks never stray too far into the open; this one was chasing something”.

Forests brought up many complex feelings for him. They were filled with the blood of hundreds of comrades. But it was also in the forest that he and Hanji had first felt the certainty of what they wanted together. And it was later there, surrounded by snow, that he had given her the ring to make their engagement official.

His brain lagged behind a moment before registering Hanji’s continued enthusiasm. “LEVI! Did I tell you that in Hizuru they actually train these birds to hunt? They will actually catch prey like rabbits and bring them back to you. And...and..they perch on your arms like a pet!” she yelled. “Fumiko told me. They actually used to have a falcon back at their home!”

“I literally rode on top of a flying Titan, Hanji. I think I can imagine humans training birds”, he snickered.

Hanji frowned subtly, looking deep in thought. “There are so many experiments I wanted to run on that Titan,” she sighed. “Now they’re all gone forever... “

“Oi,  _ megane _ !” he interrupted, “when we get out of the city, I’ll get you one of those hawks.”

“Ooooohhhhh!” she cried. “I love you, Levi!!”

“Tch”. He smirked. “Is this the forest?” He raised his hand toward the Titan forest that lay ahead of them, flanked by a smaller evergreen forest around much of its perimeter.

“We’ve been riding straight north of Stohess for over 2 hours now so...yes, I believe this was it! Let’s stop at the edge of the evergreens for a rest”.

* * *

The air was cooler in the midst of the pine trees. Although the Titan forests offered greater protection against the giants, Levi had always preferred the shorter evergreen forests. The ability to hide amongst thick green needles reminded him of the labyrinthine corridors of the Underground; as much as he loved open spaces, they weren’t where he felt safest. Pine forests also always seemed to hold great mysteries: open glades hidden deep within, such as the one where they’d found Ilse’s corpse and notebook.

Levi quenched his thirst with the water canteen and handed it to Hanji, taking in a deep breath of the fragrant pine air before exhaling and asking, “so where from here,  _ megane _ ?”

She smiled and kneeled in front of him, displaying a dark kerchief in her palms. “Do you trust me?” she asked.

Levi scowled. “Is this  _ really _ necessary?”

“Oh, it is, Captain…” she teased. “Please…” she trailed off, leaning forward to nuzzle her face against his.

Levi feigned disgust. “Ugh, fine, if not just to get your sweat off of me,  _ kuso-megane _ ”.

“Perfect!” she chimed and led him back to his horse. She handed the kerchief up to him and he obediently wrapped it over his eyes. “Hilde!” she called and clicked her tongue. Her horse trotted over to them obediently. She grabbed the leads for the two horses and started walking.

Levi leaned back in his saddle, noticing all the subtle sensations of the forest with his vision removed. The smell of pine, of course, but he also noted the scents of flowers and...berries, perhaps? There was little wind that day, but he could still sense the cool breeze that ventilated the forest, and in the distance he heard the faint twinkling of water, as from a small stream. Birdsong rang out like pleasant chimes above them.  _ It’s distant enough to not be annoying,  _ he mused. Birds in the morning were one thing to which he had never quite grown accustomed since moving above ground. It had taken Hanji years to help him find the circumstances when he found their chirps and melodies more peaceful.

The horses' hooves strode from the crunching and rustling of the pine needles underfoot to a softer floor, probably a grassy meadow or glade. The sun shone warmer on his skin and the breeze picked up ever so slightly. The horses’ slow trot came to a halt and he felt Hanji’s hand settle on his outer thigh. “Ready?” she asked softly, clearly trying to conceal the excitement in her voice. Levi removed the kerchief and looked ahead at a traditional alpine-style chalet, with a white stone foundation and a second floor built with a dark espresso-colored wood. Windows were evenly spaced throughout with overgrown flower beds beneath them. On the second floor, several of the windows opened up to a balcony surrounded by an intricately carved balustrade. While the house lay at the edge of a pine grove, a small meadow stretched in front of it, replete with white, blue and purple wildflowers sticking up in bundles among the tufts of grass.

“Whose home is this?” Levi asked, hopping down from the horse.

“It’s been abandoned for at least the last 15-20 years, as far as I could tell from my research. Some Scouts came across it during one of the older expeditions before you and I had even joined.”

Levi looked at her blankly. “And…” she grabbed his hands, and he just barely felt the cool, smooth surface of her ring resting over one of his veins. “We can move here!” she began excitedly, then started tripping over her words: “remember? It would be like what we dreamed of in the forest before...er...tsk...I mean that thing you’d overheard me saying...obviously it would be under better circumstances”. Her cheeks turned a candied red and she stuttered more: “th-that is if you...if you like it”.

He didn’t answer at first, looking at the rays of sun shining onto the house from the break in the trees above the meadow. For some reason, he was suddenly struck by the memory of his mother, supporting herself against a wall in their dark room while she coughed. He thought of the layer of soot and dirt that always appeared across her face by the end of each day and he remembered the putrid smell of all the Underground, trapped below the surface with nowhere to circulate. She was never able to come back to the light, to breathe fresh air, or to see what he had accomplished.

Hanji caught sight of Levi’s gritted teeth and asked quietly, “what’s wrong? If you don’t like it, it’s no big deal; we still made a nice expedition of it…”

“No, Hanji,” he managed, “I just…” he turned his face away trying not to cry. Hanji wrapped both of her arms around him to pull him closer. Levi breathed deeply and laid his head on her small breast. The sound of her heartbeat, after everything, always calmed him. He choked out, “I wish I could have brought my mother somewhere like this”.

Hanji kissed the top of his head and hugged him close. “You live as long as the last person who remembers you,” she said. “That means we can keep her alive in this place….” She brought him to arm’s length to look down into his eyes. “If you want.”

Levi’s expression returned to neutral and he looked at the house again. “Isn’t it kind of big for just the two of us?” he inquired.  _ There have to be at least 3 or 4 rooms on the second floor alone based on the size. _ “Are you really telling me you’ll keep up with that amount of cleaning?” He shot her a side eye.

Hanji threw her head back and laughed, the sun glinting off of her dewy face. “Well if we’re lucky at some point we can bring some new best friends into the world to keep us company”. Levi blushed involuntarily and looked at a spot just behind her shoulder. “In the meantime, I still have my old books, and there’s an order I placed for a telescope, and some machines from Marley for my Path experiments, and…”

Levi put a hand over her mouth. “Fine, let’s do it,” he laughed. “Arlert tells me the Cadets have been getting pretty confident lately. I’m sure they could use a lesson in cleaning and restoration.”

Hanji’s eyes lit up and she jumped forward, locking her legs behind Levi’s hips so that he had to drop his hand from her mouth to stabilize her. “Yay!! I cannot wait for my new workspace! And I have so many experiments I’d like to do outside of the cities...”

“If you burn this house down,  _ kuso-megane _ …”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The tough times are growing closer in the anime, even though the beloved forest scene will also be coming in part 2.
> 
> Hope this fluffier stuff helped. It's what's going to get me through the end of this apocalypse tbh.


End file.
